I hate it here so much. I've just spent the past three hours in my room, the only room, crying, so now my heads sore and Im all puffy and red.

Pauls mum has been a complete and utter COW. A cunting fucking cow over the past three days, ignoring us when we are in the kitchen, telling us to fuck off out her room, telling us its her perogative to be grumpy when we ask her why, and the best one yet, today stating that "We essentially have seperate households and therefor nothing above minimum contact is called for".

So after me feeling so uncomforatble that I dont want to go to the kitchen to make anything to eat, and have spent most of the past 5 and a half hours in my room, reading a book and eating ben and Jerrys (and I wonder why Im obese) and sending Paul away to play Battlefield because lets face it, not a lot of fun watching your fiance sob so hard shes soaked through the duvet. Is it any wonder that Im pissed off that after her acting like a complete CUNT the past three days and stating that minimum contact is all thats called for, Paul stoats into her room and strikes up a conversation?

Therefor condoning what shes been doing the past three days and essentially saying "Be as much of a cow as you like, its all right with me Marri's in the next room feeling like shit and wondering just how much more she can take before she gets the flat back"

Its got to the stage now that if he's just going to condone the way she's acting and letting her away with it, I'm not sure if I can live with that. Im not sure I want a relationship where his mother will automatically be forgiven of what she's doing and Im just supposed to take it.

I might have to eat shit, but Idont have to like how it tastes. Game over. I'm out.

She forgets she ASKED us to live here for the year, we didnt ask her.

Oh yeah and the docs pulled my sntidepressants, as they were giving me serious side effects, so yeah although I want depressed I was going blind. So two weeks of cold turkey for me before they can give me anything else. Great. In this atmosphere. If it wasnt so fucking tragic and I couldnt stop crying, I would laugh.